What if you simply devoted this year to loving yourself more?



Inc.com surveyed 2,000 people to find out the most popular resolutions for 2019.

Here they are:


  1. Diet or eat healthier (71%)

    2. Exercise more (65%)

    3. Lose weight (54%)

    4. Save more and spend less (32%)

    5. Learn a new skill or hobby (26%)

    6. Quit smoking (21%)

    7. Read more (17%)

    8. Find another job (16%)

    9. Drink less alcohol (15%)

    10. Spend more time with family and friends (13%)


It’s been said that 80% of resolutions fail by February, and only 8% of all people achieve their resolution within the year. Resolutions fail. Starting a resolution according to the date on the calendar is asking for failure. To make major changes, you need to be in the right place mentally, emotionally, and physically. Those things don’t automatically click into place because the calendar turns to January 1st.


I’d like to nominate a new idea for 2019. Instead of a resolution, make a dedication. Every single item on that list is a piece of a healthy person, so why settle on one piece? Make a dedication to love your whole self more. Choices made out of love are always more successful and powerful than decisions made out of negativity. Eat healthy because you love your body, and you’d like to nourish it- don’t punish it for being fat. Save money because you love yourself enough to create a safety net in case of emergencies- don’t restrict yourself because you feel you’re not worth a treat.  Spend more time with friends and family because their relationships make you happy, not because you’re obligated. Success starts with your own mentality.


Loving yourself does not mean you have to be content with the way things are, and it doesn’t restrict your ability to change for the better. You can love yourself on every step of the journey, not just when you reach your destination. Accept yourself and let the positivity fuel change. Look at the adjustments you wish to make as “I deserve to do this FOR myself” instead of “I have to do this TO myself.” You’ll find that self love will lift your spirits, give you positive energy, and make your goals seem much more realistic. Find support on your journey, but still be your own biggest cheerleader. Love yourself.


Love yourself the way that you are today, and try make changes in the “I deserve” mindset. One of my favorite examples of this method came up in my binge eating support group. A woman described when a family member offered her a dessert at a party. When she responded “I can’t eat that on my diet” the family member pressed her to accept the treat. They told her to enjoy herself, as it was a party. The woman made eye contact and spoke again, “I’m sorry, I WILL NOT eat that.” Phrasing got her point across. She WOULD NOT eat that because she deserved to make a healthy decision. The words “I can’t” tells others that the diet is deciding on your behalf, and can possibly be bargained with.


Don’t look at your goals as a restriction, but a conscious decision. It isn’t a matter of can or can’t,  but will or will not allow – because YOU and only YOU can decide what’s right for your body.


80% of resolutions fail by February. I genuinely wonder what the numbers will look like if we scrap the resolutions and instead make a dedication to loving ourselves. Will 80% of people decide they don’t love themselves by February? It seems to me that our dedication has a much higher possibility of success than a resolution.


I’m sick of staring into the dressing room mirror and hating myself. I’m not going to tell myself I’m not good enough, and I’m not going to punish my body. I’m not going to make a short term resolution to diet. I’m making a lifestyle change.. For LIFE. I am good enough, I love myself. My body does not deserve punishment, it deserves to be celebrated for what it CAN do. It deserves to be worked, stretched, and built up. It deserves healthy nourishment as fuel. And that girl in the mirror? She is NOT hated. She is loved. She is doing amazing things, and I support her 100%.


I’m going into 2019 with the dedication of loving myself more, and making it happen for the long haul. I want people to join me on my marathon instead of giving up after a sprint. I want you to love yourself. I want you to make changes for yourself out of recognition that you have the potential to be more, not because you feel that you fall short. I want you to love yourself more. Can you devote 2019 to yourself? You can. I’m cheering for you.

Happy New Year.

With healthy hearts,

Kate and the Kids

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